Sex is a mutually pleasurable experience when the man can last longer and the woman can climax.
But it can lead to frustration and even anger when the man can’t last longer in bed to give his woman the sexual satisfaction and orgasm she craves.
It’s the desire of every man or guy to last longer during sex and give his woman or girl an erotically fulfilling experience she can only have with him…
…but unfortunately, one ejaculates sooner than he would want to.
So, the question is…
…why do most men ejaculate sooner during sex?
Read on to find out.
5 Reasons Most Men Can’t Last Longer During Sex
#1. They fail to keep their ejaculatory muscle relaxed
The ejaculatory muscle, commonly referred to as the PC muscle, is the muscle that controls the ejaculation of semen.
This is the same muscle that controls the flow of urine – the muscle a man pushes to force urination out and contracts to stop the flow of urine.
This muscle plays a major role when it comes to sex.
It is the complete and conscious relaxation of the ejaculatory muscle that makes a man last as long as he wants during sex.
Now, not only does the relaxation of the ejaculatory muscle helps a man last as long as he wants during sex, but it also helps him fend off an impending ejaculation…
…fends off in the sense that when a man is on the verge of ejaculating but not yet ready to ejaculate and orgasm, clenching the ejaculatory muscle helps him stop himself from ejaculating.
But most men overlook this simple strategy and they end up ejaculating sooner than they would like to.
Even those who know of this technique have difficulties relaxing their ejaculatory muscle due to the sexual position or posture they adopt during sex.
And speaking of sex position, this takes us to the next reason why most men can’t last longer during sex.
The key to a man or guy lasting as long as he desires during sex is to completely relax his ejaculatory muscle throughout sex until the time he wants to end sex.
Now, to the second reason why most men can’t last longer during sex…
#2. They adopt challenging and demanding sexual postures
As mentioned above, a man can last longer during sex when he keeps his ejaculatory muscle relaxed throughout sex.
Unfortunately, most sexual postures make it difficult to relax the ejaculatory muscle…
…and among these is the missionary position.
This particular sex position puts too much tension on the body, making it difficult to keep the ejaculatory muscle relaxed for a longer period.
…looking at the missionary position, for instance, the man has to support his weight on his hands and legs.
Now, unless the man has a strong or a well-toned ejaculatory muscle, it will be difficult for him to keep his ejaculatory muscle relaxed in this challenging sexual position.
So if a man wants to make intercourse last longer, letting the woman get on top is always a good idea.
Woman-on-top positions, including the Cowgirl Sex Position and the Reverse-Cowgirl Sex Position, are the best sex positions to keep all body muscles completely relaxed as the man doesn’t need to depend on his arms and legs for support.
Woman-on-top positions are the easiest position to keep all body muscles completely relaxed.
The next reason why most men can’t last longer during sex is that…
…they get overly excited about sex (#3)
Either he is too excited about having sex or being inside a woman.
Yes, it feels good to be inside a woman… but once you get overly excited (without taking steps to control it), it is game over before it even gets started.
“When you get too excited about sex, your mind will inevitably and subconsciously contribute to the release of dopamine and testosterone hormones into your bloodstream – a surefire way to climax in a hurry,” says sex expert and author of Ejaculation by Command Lloyd Lester.
As we have sex we begin to peak in our excitement (both men and women).
It allows us to enjoy having sexual intercourse.
When a woman gets too excited, she achieves an orgasm faster (which is a good thing).
But when a man is too excited (without control), he blows his load quickly (which could be a bad thing).
To overcome this, the man has to control his breathing…
…he should breathe slowly and deeply into his belly and out through his mouth.
When he feels that he is getting too excited too quickly, he should slow down or stop thrusting and pull out of his woman if he has to… and then he should resume intercourse after his excitement has subsided.
Once you get overly excited, it’s game over almost as soon as it begins!
To the next reason why most men can’t last longer in bed…
#4. There’s excessive friction on their penis head
Friction is excellent for men who need to maintain an erection during sex.
But while more friction means better sex for everyone, it can also cause men to blow their load quickly.
When the woman is not well lubricated, or she squeezes her pelvic-floor muscles while having sex, this creates excessive friction on the penis.
Plus, any position where the woman keeps her thighs pressed together rather than spread keeps her tight and creates friction on the penis.
You see, the frenulum of the penis (the small fold of skin located on the underside of the head of the penis), is very sensitive…
…and excessive friction and stimulation on this part of the penis will increase excitement and consequently, lead to quick ejaculation.
The less intense the friction on the penis head, the less likely a man is to ejaculate early.
The next reason most men can’t last long in bed is as a result of…
…performance anxiety (#5)
In other words, worrying about not lasting longer in bed.
Lloyd Lester, author of Ejaculation by Command writes, “Anxiety is a man’s biggest enemy in the bedroom. If you’ve been telling yourself you’ve got a problem lasting longer, well…you’ve just convinced yourself that!”
When a man is worried about his sexual performance and is constantly thinking about blowing his load early (like within 1 minute), that is exactly what’s going to happen.
This is especially true when he suffers from premature ejaculation, or he thinks he suffers from premature ejaculation.
Interestingly, our mind (the brain) controls most of what happens when we have sex.
And just like thinking about erotic thoughts gets you aroused, thinking about making an early exit is exactly what will happen.
Anxiety is a man’s biggest enemy in the bedroom. If you’ve been telling yourself that you’ve got a problem lasting longer, well…you’ve just convinced yourself that!
If you are a man reading this, and you suffer from premature ejaculation, or you think you suffer from premature ejaculation…
…here’s a tip for you:
Spend 20 minutes on foreplay… then slowly move down south and perform oral sex (cunnilingus) on your woman.
When she experiences an orgasm – a clitoral orgasm, give her a minute to catch her breath then finger her to a vaginal orgasm.
Now, after giving a woman an orgasm with your tongue and fingers, this should greatly reduce the pressure and anxiety on you to perform during intercourse.
When you start having sex, go as slow as you can.
Focus on your woman and try NOT to think about the feelings in your penis.
Pay attention to your breathing… concentrate on breathing slowly and deeply throughout sex.
Try keeping your ejaculatory muscle relaxed.
When you feel you are about to ejaculate or orgasm sooner than you would want, pull out and go down on the woman again.
Wait until your arousal subsides, then resume intercourse.
Follow this simple strategy and you will last a lot longer.
So, there you have it…
…5 reasons why most men can’t last longer during sex.