Girls are used to playing hard to get with guys. Because they have guys desperately pursuing them romantically and smothering them with attention.
This gives girls power over us and hence controls us to their advantage.
Now, you too can play this “hard to get” game with girls or women and have them pursue you.
And that’s exactly what I teach you in this article – how to play hard to get with a girl.
Playing hard to get with a girl you desire is one of the most effective ways to generate attraction with her.
It communicates to her you value yourself.
And since people, in general, are attracted to things that frustrate them a little bit, playing hard to get with a girl or a woman makes her want you even more.
Without further ado… let’s get started.
How to Play Hard to Get with A Girl
What this means is to DELIBERATELY make a woman or a girl want you. And when you can tell she’s receptive to your advances, you pull back a little and make her come after you.
Now, to successfully play hard to get with a girl and make her want you, you need to start off right.
There are two crucial steps to follow:
- Make her feel attracted to you by exhibiting attractive personality and mannerism
- Subtly express your interest in her and give her a reason to chase you
Making a girl feel attracted to you by exhibiting attractive personality and mannerism, and giving her a reason to chase you by subtly expressing interest in her is key to successfully playing hard to get with her and making her want you.
Now, let’s go into detail – how to play hard to get with a girl.
Make her feel attracted to you by exhibiting attractive personality and mannerism
Before you can successfully play hard to get with a girl and make her want you, you have to first make her feel attracted to you.
Because if you don’t have her interest in the first place, you can’t make her want you… you’re going to have difficulties playing hard to get with her.
So first make her feel attracted to you by exhibiting attractive personality and mannerism, before playing hard to get with her. [Read: ‘How to Be Attractive to Girls’ and ‘How to Attract a Girl’]
The next step is to…
…subtly express your interest in her
Now, after making her feel attracted to you with your personality and mannerism, AND you can tell she feels attracted to you, you SUBTLY express your interest in her. [Read ‘The Signs a Girl Gives Off That Signal She’s Interested in You’]
You SUBTLY express interest in her in the sense that you don’t want to give away control and get her into “hard to get” mode.
Plus, when you subtly express your interest in a girl, you give her a REASON to chase you. Because without interest from you there wouldn’t be any chase on her part.
So this is what you do:
You subtly express your desire for her by:
- playfully flirting with her [Read how to flirt with a girl]
- seductively gazing into her eyes when talking to her
- touching her in an intimate manner when talking to her
Now, understand this… women can intuitively tell when a guy is interested in them. And as soon as she realizes that you want her, she will likely start playing hard to get.
Now, should you go overboard to express your interest in her, like kissing her at an opportune moment, fret not… you can still gain control, play hard to get and make her work for your approval. [Read ‘What to Do When the Girl You Desire Plays Hard to Get with You’]
Now when you can tell she’s really into you or showing signs of interest, you move to the final step…
Without interest from you, there wouldn’t be any chase on the girl’s part.
Subtly play hard to get
Now, once you successfully make a girl feel attracted to you by virtue of your personality and mannerism, and you give her a reason to chase you by subtlety expressing interest in her… you SUBTLY play hard to get.
Subtly in the sense that you don’t want to give away your intention. Because you need to keep her interested and make her chase you.
If she gets the impression that you’re DELIBERATELY playing hard to get with her, it kills the fun of it.
Because not only do you want to give her the impression that you value yourself, but you also want her to perceive you as a prize. And therefore, if she wants to be with you, then she’s gonna have to work for it.
When a girl feels an attraction for you, she would want to spend more time with you, she will be calling more often, she would want you to kiss her… in fact, she would want you to do things that show you feel attraction for her too.
You would want to reciprocate, but choose not to…
…don’t give her what she wants yet.
When she calls, don’t hastily answer the phone. Let it ring for a while, or call her back later.
Leave her wanting more… by being the one to end conversations, the first to take leave, etc.
What you want to accomplish here is to make her come after you HARD.
“We humans are attracted to things that frustrate us a little bit. And when we come across another person that seems interested but doesn’t give us exactly what we want, we start thinking about it all the time. It almost becomes a challenge to see if we can get the other person who’s resisting us to give in to us. You have reversed the roles, taken the power and now she is the one wanting something you have.”~ David DeAngelo.
So when she starts showing signs of interest, you pull back and act distant.
Another effective way of playing hard to get with a girl is to…
…make her miss you, and want you very much
Here, you make yourself scarce or unavailable from time to time so that she can feel the ache of your absence.
Make her miss you, wonder what you’re doing, and think about you.
If a girl can’t miss you, she can’t want you very much.
So instead of hanging out together every day (giving her the impression that you have no life), make yourself unavailable from time to time by engaging in other activities – like hanging out with your buddies, enjoying your hobbies, etc. [Read ‘A Powerful Way to Build Attraction with A Girl You Have a Crush On’]
Don’t go overboard or make yourself too unavailable (playing too hard to get).
Plus, you don’t want to give the girl the impression you’re no more interested in her.
You need to convey to her you have options other than pursuing her. So you need to make her feel your presence once in a while, to give her the impression that you’re not obsessing over her.
People aren’t attracted to things that they either have or know they can have at any time.
Important stuff to know
In a boy-meets-girl situation, there are two possible scenarios… either the girl plays hard to get and make the guy work for her approval, or she finds something attractive about the guy and pursues him.
Now, to make a girl or woman feel an attraction for you and want you, there are some unattractive behaviors to avoid:
- wimpishly doing favors for her
- spending money on her to win her affection
- giving her gifts too early in the relationship
- texting and calling her every night
- asking her out too often
- acting insecure and nervous when you’re with her
- openly expressing your desire for her too early in the relationship
- being agreeable to whatever she says or suggests
- being too available and hastily answering the phone every time she calls
- other wussy behaviors that make you come across as desperate and needy
When you do the aforementioned unattractive behaviors, she’s likely to play hard to get with you. Because she knows she has something you want. [Read: ‘Signs a Girl Is Playing Hard to Get with You’ and ‘Why Girls Play Hard to Get’]
So when you’re with a girl you desire, avoid the unattractive behaviors mentioned above.
Instead, make her feel attracted to you by demonstrating attractive personality traits and mannerism. And SUBTLY express your interest in her to give her a reason to chase you.
Keep reading: When the Girl You Desire Plays Hard to Get: Should You Pursue Her or Give Up?
Beautiful women or attractive girls are used to men pursuing them and smothering them with attention.
As a result, they play hard to get with these men and control them to their advantage.
Now, when you play hard to get yourself – acting aloof and acting contrary to her expectations and never giving her what she wants – you send a powerful message about how valuable you are.
Having an attractive personality and being “hard to get” makes women want you.
Because not only are you not giving her what she wants, but you have something that she needs – YOU.
When you can tell she really wants you, go ahead and make her have you. Don’t push her away and make her lose interest in you by going too far and seeming too hard to get.
So there you have it – how to play hard to get with a girl (or how to be hard to get, same thing) and make her want you.
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